Tuesday, May 4, 2010


Thinking about marriage lately. Not sure why. Maybe because someone asked me about a caterer and I realized I was too far from Bar mitzvah throwing stage to know one and that I couldn't envision needing one until wedding stage; hopefully more than a few years away. Or maybe it was when a friend tried to find a couple's bridal registry on line and along with their registry discovered more information than she bargained for, including their wedding details, honeymoon destination and the price they paid for their house. Wow, the information age has really changed the wedding process!

So while planning a successful wedding might have changed I suspect that having a successful marriage has not. I thought it might be great to ask friends and family what is the one, or two, pieces of advice they would give their children on picking a mate and having a happy marriage. Positive or negative advice is fine. My hope is that this becomes a larger collaboration. Please pass on your advice and that of your friends and family. Feel free to send them this piece. You can email it directly to me at or leave your advice in the comment section. I promise to organize it and pass it back on to everyone. Thanks!
Below I've passed on a few gems from some first ladies (excuse any paraphrasing). I thought their advice really rang true.

Betty Ford; On Marriage
Marriage is always a 20%/80% deal. Sometimes you're 20 and he's 80 and sometimes it's the other way around.

Babara Bush; On picking a mate:
Find someone you love to be with and someone who shares yor hobbies.

Michelle Obama; On picking a mate:
Start out with someone you respect and trust. Be sure you generally like the other person, like the way they think, like the person they are. If you are with someone you trust, respect and like, you will have that foundation you need for when you hit those inevitable bumps.

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1 comment:

  1. My mother-in-law told me this one:

    "Marry for breakfast and dinner, not lunch"......she did not make this up, but disliked the retirement being-together 24/7.

    Let's see,
    Laughing together........sense of humor is important.


    and of course... love, like, respect and trust.