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Tuesday, December 15, 2009

marriage

Perhaps it is the fact that my oldest is getting older and relationships can become more serious . Or maybe because I have somehow managed to become addicted to Say Yes to the Dress(more on that later). Either way I have been thinking about what makes a good marriage and what doesn't. How does anyone in their 20s correctly pick the right person with whom they will manage to stay with for the next 50 or so years, if they are lucky enough to to get them. It is impossible to know what one's 30s, 40s, 50s etc will bring thought you can be sure they will be full of chaos, ups and downs, struggles,hard decisions and hopefully lots of fun and joy. The fact that anyone actually does pick the right person for a life time seems impossible. yet we know it happens all the time. The question is how? Is it just good luck or is there a magical formula?
I highly recommend trying to find the Oprah at the white house special that recently aired. I couldn't find a written transcript or i would have posted it here but the full video is all over you tube. Sure it's cool to see the White house all decorated and Bo is super cute and very well behaved. I have a vision of Cooper leaping on Oprah and knocking her over which I suspect would not go over well. But if you are short on time , or patience, just go to the part, near the end, where Barack and Michelle are seated together and talk about their marriage. They talk about both being strong stubborn personalities and what the think kept them together. I thought it was amazing. If they bothered to teach relationship skills in high school that 4 minutes should be required.